A few years ago, I decided to visit my
brother who was stationed in Germany.
I assumed that most Germans would speak
English. But I found that many people
spoke only their native tongue -
including the ticket inspector on the
train. He punched my ticket, then
chatted cordially for a bit, making
gestures like a windmill. I simply
nodded from time to time to show him
that I was interested. When he had gone,
an American woman soldier in the
compartment leaned forward and asked if
I spoke German.

"No," I confessed.

"Then that explains," she said, "why you
didn't bat an eyelid when he told you that
you were on the wrong train."


A response to a corny pick-up line.

Male: Your body's like a temple.
Female: Sorry, there are no services
today.