Company memo

Below is an article which interests me:

Welcome back to the office after Labour Day.Please be advised that there are new rules and regulations implemented to raise the efficiency of our organisation.

PERSONAL DAYS
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday and Sunday.

SICK DAYS
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness.If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

SURGERY
As long as you are an employee here, you need all your organs.You should not consider removing anything.We hired you intact.To have sthg removed constitutes a breach of employment.Thank you for your loyalty to our company.We are here to provide a postive employment experience.Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, allegations, accusations, contemplation, consternation, insinuations, and input should be directed elsewhere.

Have a nice day.

EVERYBODY MAKES MISTAKES ;THAT'S WHY THEY PUT ERASERS ON PENCILS